You are growing up so fast, it scares me sometimes.
Not quite the usual set of words you say to a girl at midnight, on her birthday that too. But those were exactly the words that popped out of my mouth last night while I held her in my arms. She looked at me with her eyes half open, my words making no sense to her, I reckon. ‘Thank you’ she said, her arms trying to wrap themselves around me. A part of me felt that they were trying to tell me, it’s alright, big brother.
I have been every bit possessive about the people that I love and care for and she tops that list, any given day. Wanting to do everything that I can, to protect her from anything wrong that life may throw at her, I used to believe that it is something that I was entitled to. And it is not something that I am proud of, but I guess that is how I am wired to be. Took me a while (and a couple interventions by few lovely ladies in my life) to realise that it was not the way to go about with life. With her life. That at some stage, I would have to let go of her hand so that she can learn to walk on her own. That just being the metaphorical way of putting it. What those words cleverly hide is that I would have to let her be vulnerable to life’s many phases, stand head-on with all of its challenges and make life changing decisions on her own. I can always have her back, though. That is allowed. Pick her up after she falls. Nurse her wounds so that she can walk and run again. Let her take another hit from life, if that is what it comes to. But it has to be her journey.
It’s been three years since I have been trying to push myself to be that guy for her, and today when she completes that first year of her twenties… I know in my heart how proud I am of her. She is on her way to be the girl that I have imagined her to be. Even better. And the best part is, she has achieved it on her own, trying to stand on her own two feet. So proud.
Wish you a very happy birthday dear sister, and a very happy 2016. That I know, is going to be another remarkable year that will add thousands of wonderful memories to your soul. I also know that you have it in you to take on whatever life throws at you and make a way for yourself. I hope you know that too. And I want you to believe in that. If at any point in time, you feel otherwise, I want you to know, I got your back. No matter what. For I love you, pretty girl.